Even two decades on, I still wake up at 2am screaming, says 7/7's most injured survivor

When Dan Biddle woke up on the morning of July 7, 2005, with a splitting headache, he briefly considered calling in sick. But the construction project manager's conscientious decision to struggle into work was to have devastating consequences.

Aged just 26 and with his whole life ahead of him, Dan became the most seriously injured survivor of the 7/7 terrorist attacks in London. He lost both legs, an eye, his spleen, and was deafened in one ear when terrorist Mohammad Sidique Khan, whom he was standing next to, detonated a bomb on the Circle Line Tube train at Edgware Road at 8.51am.

It was one of four suicide bombs set off in central London on public transport within the space of an hour, killing 52 people and injuring hundreds more. Today marks the 20th anniversary of that horrendous day.

Now 46, Dan, like many others impacted by the bombings, plans to attend a special invitation-only memorial service at St Paul's Cathedral in London to pay tribute to victims - and remember the survivors, like himself, who are still struggling in the aftermath.

It is, indeed, a miracle Dan will be there at all.

He spent eight weeks in a coma after the attack and 12 weeks in intensive care. He somehow managed to survive three cardiac arrests, a collapsed lung, multiple internal injuries, MRSA infection and later several suicide attempts. He continues to battle complex PTSD, hallucinations of the bomber's face, severe anxiety, OCD, and survivor's guilt.

"I live with what happened every minute of every day," admits Dan. "I have nightmares every night when I can see his face staring at me and I can see his rucksack. I can smell the burning bodies. I can taste blood in my mouth.
"When I go to bed at night I don't want to shut my eyes because when I do it's like a horror film. Twenty years on I still dread going to bed."

Days are also difficult because Dan's anxiety triggers panic attacks. "I died three times so when I have a panic attack it feels like I am having a heart attack again and I think I am going to die," he explains. "It affects every aspect of my life. I have 50 to 100 flashbacks a day."
Dan has had therapy to give him the tools to try and manage his complex PTSD the best he can but he will never be cured of it. Confined to a wheelchair, he struggled to find employment after the attack despite having excellent qualifications in his field.
So in the 20 years since the bombings, he has gone on to try and fight for disability equality, diversity and inclusion rights.

In 2022, he established The National Diversity Employment and Advisory Service Ltd, which supports neurodivergent young people and adults into employment. Besides being the CEO of the organisation, he is also a disability law expert and motivational speaker. He remains furious at the lack of employment opportunities for disabled people and the Government's recent attempts to cut benefits without offering enough support to get disabled people into work.

"If I lose my PIP (the personal independence payments disabled people receive to help with living expenses) I lose my car and all my independence," he says. "Disabled people like me want to work. Those who have an acquired disability through accident or disease have skills, they have something to offer but all that employers see is the disability."

The £118,000 compensation he received for his injuries hasn't been anywhere enough.
"I was a young man and I lost my career, my health, my ability to buy a house, get life insurance, or ever have financial or emotional stability. The Criminal Injuries Compensation Authority needs a complete overhaul. We were treated as if we'd been mugged."

Dan is understandably incredibly angry and admits he is finding it harder and harder to bounce back from setbacks as he lives with the daily trauma of what happened to him 20 years ago. What he really wants is for the Government to hold a public inquiry into 7/7.
"There is this misconception that because we have had an inquest that is the same thing but it isn't," he explains. "I don't understand how if the Manchester terror attack, the Grenfell fire, and the shooting of Jean Charles de Menezes, all tragic events, warrant a public inquiry, what is it about the 7/7 bombings, the worst terrorist atrocity on British soil, that doesn't?
"I would like to get into a room with Keir Starmer, who as a lawyer understands the legalities of these things, and have him explain to me why we can't have a public inquiry. All I can think is that they must have something to hide."

Dan believes there were huge inadequacies in the British security services, to whom the bombers were known, and he believes those inadequacies exist to this day and that the British public is far from safe from future attacks.

He is hoping to make the journey to St Paul's today, and to see Adrian Heili, the ex-army medic who saved his life that day. Adrian ignored his own injuries to help save Dan and the pair have remained close since. He was awarded the Stanhope Medal in 2008 for outstanding bravery in saving Dan's life and assisting to save 16 others.

The trained first aider was travelling on the Westbound Circle Line tube train, which had just left Edgware Road station, when there was a loud bang from the front of the train. The train slowed and stopped as thick choking smoke filled the carriage.
Dan had been blown completely out of the tube carriage by the bomb and was lying between the carriage and the wall. Severely injured, he was calling for help.

Adrian, who was in the next carriage, forced the door and jumped onto the adjacent track to help him. He then applied makeshift tourniquets to both his legs and dressed his other wounds. "Adrian is the only person who truly understands what I went through," Dan says. "It will be good to see him."

The memorial service will be attended by more than 400 survivors and families of the 52 killed. Originally from East London, Dan now lives in Abergavenny in Monmouthshire, Wales, with his wife Gem, where life is quieter and more slow-paced. The couple celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary last month.

"I wouldn't be here without Gem. I couldn't do it without her. She understands my PTSD," he says. "Sirens are a real thing for me especially, so she knows to turn the music up in the car when we hear one, to hold my hand to reassure me.For years she couldn't use hair straighteners because the smell of her hair burning would take me right back there. It is the same in a restaurant if meat is burning or if a balloon pops at a child's birthday party I'm right back there lying on the floor surrounded by burning bodies. I know I am a deeply traumatised individual and it hasn't lessened in 20 years. I still wake up at 2am screaming."

Dan has made several attempts on his own life over the years and admits he often thinks, "I wish it had killed me."
Gem has taught herself about complex PTSD and has been a constant pillar of support and strength for him. Dan adds: "I feel guilty she doesn't have the kind of life she deserves."

He and Adrian are planning to launch a petition to push for a public inquiry and are hoping to gather 10,000 signatures to force a response from the Government.
In the meantime Dan has also written a book, Back From The Dead: The Untold Story Of the 7/7 Bombings, published last month and described by ITV This Morning presenter Ben Shephard as an "extraordinary recollection".
Dan himself wrote: "They say cats have nine lives so I've been giving them a bit of a run. I've died three times on an operating table and had the same number of goes at killing myself. Luckily, the doctors were brilliant at saving my life and I was crap at ending it."

• Back From the Dead: The Untold Story of the 7/7 Bombings by Dan Biddle with Douglas Thompson (Mirror Books, £20) is out now; Attack on London: Hunting the 7/7 Bombers is on Netflix now. The commemoration service of the 20th anniversary of the 7/7 London bombings will be live-streamed from 11.15am via london.gov.uk/events/commemoration-20th-anniversary-london-bombings